17 different women, 36 crazy children, 0 babies in utero
Adventures, Advice and Questions from a group of Mormon women who met in Queens, NY and have now scattered all over the place.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
Beware of Flying Objects During Sacrament Meeting and Other Sunday Notables
There was a minor incident, resulting in one casualty, in our Sacrament Meeting today. DH and I were using our usual negotating tactics (fruit snacks and matchbox cars) to keep our boys busy and quiet for the meeting. There was peace for the first 30 minutes or so....and then in less than 1.2 seconds war was suddenly upon us. Asher (19 months), grabbed an elastic hair band that I had absentmindedly put around my wrist in the morning and had forgotten to take off for church. He flicked it back with his little fingers like a sling shot and BAM....that thing was airborne. A teeny tiny red elastic SCUD missile headed for an unsuspecting target. Four pews in back of us, it nailed a man square in the chest. I whisper back a pathetic apology while Asher laughed, obviously delighted with his shot. Thank goodness my little rocket launcher hit a chest and not an eyeball and thank goodness our ward is the size of a small European country and I won't likely run into the people who happened to be sitting around us anytime soon.
Today's incident barely overshadowed our other Sacrament Meeting mishap a couple weeks earlier. Noe lost one of his beloved matchbox cars under the long, full skirt of an older lady seated next to him. The lady was dozing off and hadn't noticed that the car had slipped under her skirt. I knew exactly what was going to happen...but unfortunately I couldn't grab Noe before he had pulled that poor woman's skirt up and dived down underneath it to retrieve his car. I'm pretty sure it was more leg (and garment) than she planned to expose that day! Bless that lady for her understanding and sense of humor.
Tonight, I was hopping down our stairs on my good leg with Asher(I reinjured my knee last week before I had a chance to have surgery which was lucky, I guess???), worn out from the day and trying to figure out where this motherhood thing and I had gone wrong. After we arrived safely at the bottom of the staircase, Asher smiles at me, claps his little hands together and exclaims, "Good job, Mama!" His first intelligible sentence of the day...or maybe even the week.
Thanks kid, I need to hear that once in a while...even if you are a little terrorist in training.
Today's incident barely overshadowed our other Sacrament Meeting mishap a couple weeks earlier. Noe lost one of his beloved matchbox cars under the long, full skirt of an older lady seated next to him. The lady was dozing off and hadn't noticed that the car had slipped under her skirt. I knew exactly what was going to happen...but unfortunately I couldn't grab Noe before he had pulled that poor woman's skirt up and dived down underneath it to retrieve his car. I'm pretty sure it was more leg (and garment) than she planned to expose that day! Bless that lady for her understanding and sense of humor.
Tonight, I was hopping down our stairs on my good leg with Asher(I reinjured my knee last week before I had a chance to have surgery which was lucky, I guess???), worn out from the day and trying to figure out where this motherhood thing and I had gone wrong. After we arrived safely at the bottom of the staircase, Asher smiles at me, claps his little hands together and exclaims, "Good job, Mama!" His first intelligible sentence of the day...or maybe even the week.
Thanks kid, I need to hear that once in a while...even if you are a little terrorist in training.
15 Comments:
No flying objects, but a lot of general commotion from our family. And though I am grateful that we have a place to meet, it does not help that it is in our gym. How do you tell your kids not to run when you have Sac. Mtg. in the gym? My 15-mo.-old is just a wreck....I won't be sitting for sac. mtg. for quite some time I believe.
posted by Kage at 8/06/2006 04:21:00 PM
Kage, I hear you about not sitting in Sac meeting - today marks just hte 2nd week in a row we have not had to take DD out - she is 23 months. It's a miracle. Luckily the boy hasn't been difficult for about 9 months but the little girl can also be "just a wreck".
posted by chloe at 8/06/2006 07:59:00 PM
I am so glad to hear that there are others who have normal issues in Sac meeting! Our almost 2 yr old boy is a VERY energetic little madman who loves to throw things... doesn't really matter what, anything will do. So we really can't even have matchbox cars or he'd surely hurl them across the room at someone too. Really we just hope than an nearly unending supply of raisins and cereal and books will keep him distracted from finding things to toss!
posted by Rachel H at 8/06/2006 09:45:00 PM
Okay, first of all... so funny Jen, I laughed at the thought of it!
And can we talk for one minute about how exhausted and unfulfilled I am after church. At least I had my DH there for some of it yesterday as opposed to the three weeks before where it was just me, a 2 year old and a 9 month old... IN A GYM! I haven't felt that I have gotten anything out of church for a LONG time. I am little bitter about that and wonder often why do I even go????
Thoughts or concerns anyone?
posted by Kelly at 8/07/2006 05:46:00 AM
I'm with ya Z!!! B has been on call the past 3 Sundays as well. Getting up and getting 4 girls and myself dressed is just a joke! I seriously get to church almost angry. Great attitude huh! Then I come home and can't even remember what in the crap was taught.........obviously NOTHING for me! haha. But seriously, I have NO clue what to do about making it better. I really try. I've taken lots of advice and ideas, not much has worked so far. Thank heavens the girls are cute cause I really feel like a freak show! AHHHHHHHHHH!
posted by Anonymous at 8/07/2006 08:49:00 AM
Jen, at least you've found the humor in what can be so frustrating for those of us with active young ones in church! And nice to know your boy has good athletic abilities.
I feel for Zinone and others... I have only one 18-month old to wrangle, yet I've had so many times at church where I just found an enclosed room where he could run around and I'd sit and cry and wonder why I bother going to church only to run around keeping him out of trouble. Day of rest, HA!
Now I teach Primary and have to be there, while George gets to be the wrangler and miss class.
The one good thing was being able to bond with other mothers missing their meetings, too. I think there should be a special class, noise and mayhem allowed, for all the mothers and wild babies where they can at least be together and support each other.
And I imagine/hope there'd be some great blessings for mothers who wear themselves out coming to church with little ones.
posted by Legendary Pink Dot at 8/07/2006 09:15:00 AM
Right now for us sacrament meeting is just conditioning Googie to come and sit for as long as possible. I don't think I'll actually be able to pay attention for at least another 5-10 years, depending on how many kids we have. This last Sunday I spent a good 45 minutes whispering/singing "Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree" (currently her favorite song to do the actions to) over and over again during sacrament meeting. I think in these young years we just have to get them into the mindset of sitting quietly and hopefully by the time they're 3-5 they'll be able to quietly entertain themselves. But then again, maybe I'm just dreaming.
posted by Trivial Mom at 8/07/2006 09:41:00 AM
Z, I understand how you feel - I think we have all been in the same boat at one time or another. Our 3 1/2 year old is now totally fine in sacrament...but it took nearly 3 years to get to that point. Now we are training the 23 month old and I see the light at the end of the tunnel. I think we'll make it through in another 6 months.
It has been only recently (in the last 6 months) that I have been able to get ANYTHING out of sacrament meeting because my entire being has been focused on keeping my kids happy/entertained/reasonably quiet.
An older friend of ours told us a year ago (when we were still struggling with DS) that when our children are small we don't go to church for ourselves, we go for THEM. Our sole purpose is to set an example and show them that it is important we go to church and we need to act a certain way when we are there. WHen he said that, a little light bulb went off in my head and I GOT it. Didn't like it, but got it. So I try to keep that in mind when DD colors her hair with washable markers and my son makes his version of a "traffic jam" under the pews with his matchbox cars. Silent mantra: "It's for them...it's for them..."
posted by chloe at 8/07/2006 11:57:00 AM
I teach primary and before that was in the YW pres. so I haven't been to RS in so long. Yesterday we were on vacation in LA so I got to go to RS. Their Patriarch was speaking to them about blessings and he was an incredible speaker. I was so happy to be back. Then my son started to fall asleep. He's started to whimper and whine a lot right before he falls asleep for his afternoon nap. Usually, I just let him. This time I had to take him out. I was angry, bummed, and irritated. I was so excited to be in such a neat lesson, then I had to leave. What the??? I figured this is just the beginning of a long road of sitting in the halls, mothers lounge and anywhere else to keep the kiddies quiet. I really liked chloe's explanation of it's for them. I will definitely be repeating that mantra...
posted by Melissa at 8/07/2006 12:39:00 PM
Z: I also feel your struggle. I REMEMBER how hard it is to get young kids to church, especially in NY, with a working husband (or in my case one in the bishopric). It was really a battle for me...physically, emotionally, spriritually. Why would the Lord want us to be this tired on a Sunday? I would ask myself.
As DH put it: Church and I were not friends for awhile, and struggling w. kids was a big part of the reason why.
Once in a while I would stay home, but that never made me feel any better. My mom also told me what Chloe heard...it's for the kids, to get them in the habit of going to church early. I never liked that either, although there is probably some truth to it. I finally decided that I needed to keep going to church during this time even if I wasn't getting any spiritual nourishment because it would be too easy to stop and then never go back....at least for me. I've heard it's REALLY hard to get back to church after a long absence and I could see myself falling into that trap.
I really like Squiddy's idea for a mom class during SS and RS....really, why don't they do that? Not forcing moms to attend, but giving them the option if they had pre-nursery kids to deal with.
Our ward is so big (seriously, its like 800+ people and not even in Utah!) that there is an overflow room for latecomers. We go in there a lot with the kids, which is nice, but you can't see any faces. For the first three months we lived in the ward, I had attended every week but I still couldn't pick our bishop out of a lineup!
posted by Jen at 8/07/2006 12:50:00 PM
I don't think I can handle going to church just for the kids for the next 3-5 years. I don't have it in me to keep on going and going with the empty feeling I come away with. Sacrament meetings are of course the worst. Trying to get them to stay quiet, not fight with each other, not cause distractions. I feel like I hear about every other 30 seconds of talks and testimonies and it is so disjointed, it's hard to understand the larger picture. Often I can tell that a good talk is being given, but I can't really sit and enjoy it. There have got to be some things that can help. I refuse to only go for the kids. Call me selfish, but I require and need spiritual fulfillment out of church. Maybe I need to try to get more out of Sunday School since I can go there with no kids.
Anyway, does anyone have any suggestions for what helps during sacrament meeting???
posted by Belle at 8/07/2006 02:54:00 PM
Michelle, I know exactly how you feel.
I decided that I needed to have my spirit strengthened in other ways becasue it wasn't going to happen at church ( at least not for awhile). I have started reading the Ensign more, working through the scriptures, reading up on my patriarchal blessing, discussing things with my friends and DH and it has helped. I try to say a prayer Sunday morning before church that I will feel SOMETHING at SOME point while I am in church and that has helped too.
It's hard and unfortunately we are on this path for many more years with our little ones. Find ways to get your spirituality recharged outside of church/Sunday meetings.
posted by chloe at 8/07/2006 09:37:00 PM
My sister's church (not an LDS church) has a "cry room") at the back of the chapel. The "cry room" is where parents can take their noisy (not just crying) children and still somewhat enjoy the service. It has a glass wall that looks into the chapel and has the sound pumped in. I think it's a great idea because I, as a parent, am pretty good at blocking out child noise so I can listen to what is being said. But in sacrament meeting, all of my extra energy gets put into wrangling the children so their noise does not distract those who cannot block it out.
posted by This is Carrie at 8/08/2006 06:36:00 PM
I think I have seen one of those cry rooms carrie, ingenious.
posted by Kage at 8/08/2006 07:19:00 PM
Maybe I'm imagining this but didn't the old Tabernacle in Temple Square have a "cry room"? I remember walking into this little space off the the side that was glassed off with a few pews... Anyone?
posted by chloe at 8/08/2006 09:30:00 PM
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