From the Tales Inbox: How Do I Help Tommy?

Today in primary a mom and her son came into my Sunbeam class. The first thing that entered my mind was "Another 3 yr old! I can't handle any more! There's already seven of them and my team teacher is being put on bead rest because she's prego with twins. I cannot handle anymore."

Then I noticed little Tommy. First his eyes, big and blue. Second...something isn't right, I'm not sure what. I tell Tommy's mom hello, introduce myself and welcome her and Tommy to class. I am new to the ward and have never met Tommy's mom or never even knew Tommy was in our class. The other children ignore Tommy and his mom at first but once they notice Tommy is wearing a diaper, drinking from a bottle and laying on the floor humming, they start to stare. I start to cry.

On our way to singing time Tommy's mom says goodbye and starts to leave with Tommy. I offer to take him to primary with the class. "It's okay, he has to be carried most of the time" his mom says.

She continues to tell me that he has never been to primary before because none of the teachers have offered. They don't understand. And it's a lot of work taking care of him. I didn't know how to respond.

"I'll be okay" I assure her, not really knowing if I will. I really have NO idea what is wrong with him, but how hard can it be? It's just 10 minutes of singing. She concedes and I carry a BIG 3 yr old to singing time where he LOVES to hear the piano. We get him a chair and sit right next to the pianist. He just stares and her fingers on the keys while she is playing. When she stops playing, he starts humming and walking around and then pounds on the piano himself.

I get nervous, is this ok? Is he bothering others with his playing?? I look around and see his mom with a worried look on her face. The pianist tells him to play, and tells me the story...Tommy is extremely autistic. He is actually 5 years old (which explains his size) and has younger twin brothers that are autistic too. His mom has only brought them to church a couple of times. Tommy has never been to primary or singing time. They don't get out much. It's too hard for her.

We sit by the piano and he plays along with her to "I am a Child of God." I look at his mom watching from the doorway and she is smiling. Tommy is relaxed. I start to cry more. It's sad to think he never been to singing time before when he LOVES music so much. And I can't imagine the heartache his mother must go through trying to care for her children never feeling like she can get a break.

I want Tommy to come back to Primary. I want him to listen to the music. Most of all I want others to understand that he is a Child of God. How do I help the other kids understand Tommy? How do I teach an autistic boy? How do I let his mother know that he is needed, wanted, and safe in Primary? How do I help??

Thanks,
Jessie