17 different women, 36 crazy children, 0 babies in utero
Adventures, Advice and Questions from a group of Mormon women who met in Queens, NY and have now scattered all over the place.

Monday, April 02, 2007

March Madness

Seriously, March was the maddest month I have experienced in a long time. Amid the madness that became my life, I had a few mothering moments that I finally have time to share. Actually, I don't really have time, I am just delaying the inevitable ironing and cleaning and showering that I need to do right now.

Let's begin with what just happened as I am sitting here trying to type. My baby continually hit me in the face and pulled off my glasses, until finally, I hit her back. I hit her a litle harder than I meant to. She cried, and got over it very quickly and I said I was sorry, and said: "It's not nice to hit", and in my mind said: "So, then don't hit your kid".

The only other time I have hit my baby's like that is when they bite down with their teeth during breast feeding....that's more of a gut reaction to pain though, and less of a disciplining strategy.

My second mothering moment happened last week. Background: My daughter goes to a private Catholic School for Pre-K and they sponsor these field trips for the kids, that are usually around $30 dollars. The majority of the kids in her class do not go on these trips, and I have never let her go either.

A few weeks ago there was an Olympic Day form that was the same price as a field trip, only going to be held on campus. I debated on whether or not to pay the money, simply because it was on campus, and a specific school thing. Time went by and I moved etc. and forgot about it. The day before Olympic Day my daughter came home and said: "We practiced for Olympic Day today." She was really excited about it. I was mad, b/c I didn't think the school should have specifically practiced this, and as a result gotten the children excited about it, when not all children were going to participate. I felt bad, and I told my daughter that I hadn't paid the money for her to participate, and suggested that she stay home from school. She of course was fine with that. In this instance I felt like the school was in the wrong, I am not sure if I did the right thing by keeping her home, I later learned that only 3 kids from her class forked out the cash to participate.

My third mothering moment was getting robbed. I picked up my daughter from school and came back to my car with a broken window and purse stolen. I was an emotional wreck about it for the next 3 hours. I barely even spoke to my daughters. As we drove away from the scene and they were talking, I asked them to please be quiet, as I just continued sobbing. The next day my older daughter wanted to play policeman, and imitated the cop that I had dealt with while reporting the incident, and I played along with it as best I could. I just completely shut down as a mother during that situation.

My fourth mothering moment was dying Easter Eggs. We did this yesterday. The girls were really into it, and I feel that I had a lot of patience while I endured my almost-2-year-old THROWING eggs into the dye bowls, Eating the dye, spilling an entire bowl of yellow all over my brand new kitchen counter, and getting sparkly paint up and down her arms. They had a really great time, and I don't think they were thinking about any of the above moments, and actually, neither was I.


  • That is annoying that the school got the kids excited about an extra, costly activity that they might not be involved in. But it sounds like most of the parents were thinking the same as you in the end.

    If I had been robbed, I think I would have reacted in the same exact way.

    I love the wonderful, good, make a memory moments of motherhood. Hopefully my kids remember those moments more than my not so great mother moments.
    posted by Blogger TftCarrie at 4/02/2007 07:36:00 PM  

  • i'm not a mom.

    i like how honest you are. i'm sure some moms would be too embarrassed to admit they hit their own kid.

    i used to live with my friend who had a 4 yo and 7 yo. I was driving her 4 yo son home from daycare and while on the freeway he decided to grab the steering wheel. i slapped him pretty hard and he cried. i felt really bad but it was such a gut reaction. maybe that is the real reason children under a certain age aren't supposed to sit in the front seat...
    posted by Blogger brenbot at 4/02/2007 08:42:00 PM  

  • First, the school's field trip policy is lame and ridiculous. Especially when only a few kids go. Duh. You'd think they'd figure out a better way. I think it was absolutely great that you kept her home. My sister has dealt with stupid schools in Louisiana (though stupid for other reasons) and she kept her kids home sometimes too. I think it shows that you disagree with their policy and that you care about your kid. And I think it takes guts.

    Hitting. A few times my hand has whapped a kid and it almost happens without thinking--a last resort reflex. What happens more often is I lose it and yell. I feel so crappy after I do. I always try harder. I hate yelling. Hate it.

    I have had bad days, not as bad as being robbed, but bad nonetheless. I remember huddling in the corner of the couch once and telling my kids I needed to be alone. I just let them (made them) go on without me until I could regain myself. Sometimes Moms need "time out" too--it's ok.

    And Easter eggs. Aaak! Our first dying experience was a scary one. But you know the kids loved it. I only do 2-3 colors now as all six cups of dye out makes me too uptight. Glad you and the girls had fun--not every mom does that messy stuff for her kids!
    posted by Blogger Katie at 4/03/2007 06:39:00 AM  

  • I enjoyed this post Kage. I agree with brenbot - it is really refreshingly honest. I'm sure there will come a day when I have a tough day with Baby T and say, "I remember when Kage wrote about something like this - thank goodness I'm not the only one!".

    And yes, I think I would've reacted the exact same way if I had been robbed ---- who knows? I mean, it was so fresh... how do you know how to get your wits about you in that sort of situation??

    Oh - and easter eggs...... I'm all for kids making messes and getting dirty, but egg dye is scary (especially in your brand new condo!).
    posted by Blogger Beth at 4/03/2007 12:21:00 PM  

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