I Was A Teenage Bride

Today marks the 10th anniversary of my marriage to an amazing man. When I tell people how long I have been married I am often met with looks of surprise and then the comment "You look so young!". Well the truth is, I am young to have been married ten years because I was a teenage bride.

I met my dh during the second semester of my freshman year of college. He was six months off his mission and caught my attention with his American flag Converse shoes in Country Dance 101. Three months later we were engaged and three months after that we were married. I was eighteen.

We have had a few other celebrations in our home this week. Our oldest daughter, Princess, turned four and our youngest, Pumpkin, turned one. I can't believe how time flies. The next thing I know, they are going to be eighteen, I am going to be sending them off to college, and they could getting married. I get a little nervous thinking about the advice I will give them about dating and marriage as they go off to start lives of their own. Most people in the world (and in the church) would say "Don't get married young", "Find yourself", "Stay single so you can travel and have adventures", "When/If you find someone, date for a long time-that's the only way to really get to know each other". While in my head this advice sounds reasonable and logical I just don't think I can pass it on. Why? Because not following this kind of advice is what worked for me. Not following this kind of advice has brought me to a life I really love and have never once regretted. Some would just shrug off the success of my "young marriage" as pure luck, but I know the spirit never leads you to path only to leave you there to depend on luck.

On the other hand, thinking about either of my girls coming home at age eighteen with a fiance in tow totally freaks me out. Either my parents hid their true feelings well, or I was totally oblivious to their apprehension because I don't remember them freaking out too much. Now that I am a parent, I can be sure they must have overflowing with concern.

I think I would like to take the focus off the actual timeline of marriage and concentrate on teaching them to be independent, strong, spiritual and intelligent women, who will be ready and able to make their own good choices about dating and eventually marriage whenever (or if ever) those decisions come along.

So what do you think a "Once-a-teenage-bride, happily-married, now-a-mother-of-two-girls" should pass on as marriage advice?

I assure you I won't advise them that marrying young is the only road to happiness-because it's obviously not, but I also think advising them only the opposite would be a mistake as well.

The real truth is I may not have to worry about it at all. I think my husband's plan is to lock the girls up in the house until they are at least 25 while denying them access to not just make-up but also deodorant, razors, face wash, and contact lenses in hopes to keep the boys at bay.