17 different women, 36 crazy children, 0 babies in utero
Adventures, Advice and Questions from a group of Mormon women who met in Queens, NY and have now scattered all over the place.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better

Okay, well maybe not always better, but I can do it one handed with a baby on my hip.

The other morning, I was getting really frustrated because I couldn't put my contacts in while holding Pumpkin. I realized this frustration stemmed from the fact that I have learned to do so many things one-handed since having children. It really is a talent most mother's have to develop to survive. To celebrate this talent that will never be seen in the Olympics or on American Mother Idol, I started a list of my biggest "one-handed" accomplishments (I am still perfecting the putting in of the contacts).

Here it is so far:
-make breakfast, lunch, or dinner (I can even chop thanks to my Pampered Chef Chopper--no little fingers can get in the way).
-decorate for the ward Christmas party (I wasn't in charge, but I did have to set up a number of little nativity sets).
-teach a YW lesson (the challenge was actually keeping the girls attention on me instead of the smiley, goofy, drooly baby).
-type on the computer (still working on all the typos).
-pick up dog poop (without getting any on my hands or on the baby).
-clean the ward chapel (and my house).
-make a bottle of formula... in a Dr. Brown's bottle (far more complicated).
-pee in a public toliet (harder in jeans but no prob in my velour sweat pants).

Seriously, I got skills and I know you do too. Let's hear it.


  • A couple of weeks ago I'm at an enrichment class where a lady (who actually has a cooking show) is teaching us wonderful things. I tell her that I only make food that can be cooked one handed because of holding a child in the other. I tell her that I'm actually pretty good and have several recipes I can share. She looks at me really seriously for a second and then says " I wonder if we could do a show on one handed cooking tips and recipes" I'm still waiting to hear back from her, but she has looked at me several times with a gleam in her eyes.

    One of the great skills (that is almost extinct because of credit/debit cards) is check writing with one hand. I saw my mom do it and I have developed my own method. But I think our children will never have to develop this skill. Progress!
    posted by Blogger Shaleen at 2/23/2006 05:39:00 PM  

  • I can sign a credit receipt and, (drumroll please) put on eyeliner, even liquid eyeliner. Today I had to put away my parking ticket, sign a receipt, hold one kid and step on the pant leg of the other so he couldn't run off, all while keeping a smile plastered on my face as their cries rang throughout the mall. Pilates ain't got nothin on that!
    I have 2 boys and I am able to pat them both on the rear when they are getting into trouble together. One hand for each rear counts as a one handed activity, right?
    posted by Blogger Mo Mommy at 2/23/2006 06:33:00 PM  

  • I can pick up almost anything off the floor and open drawers and cupboards with my toes. Working on brushing my teeth with my toes next.
    posted by Blogger Kage at 2/24/2006 03:23:00 PM  

  • kage,
    is that just low cupboards or can you reach the one above your fridge or oven as well? That'd be a sight to see! ;)
    posted by Blogger Mo Mommy at 2/24/2006 06:57:00 PM  

  • MO-
    Hmmm, I am going to try for that tomorrow and report back.
    posted by Blogger Kage at 2/24/2006 07:37:00 PM  

  • I betcha she can do it. I have seen this girl do the splits in the Times Square subway station. She's freakin' Elastigirl! (lucky for her dh--hee hee)
    posted by Blogger TftCarrie at 2/24/2006 07:39:00 PM  

  • You guys rock. I am delighted to be old enough to be your mother and I feel such motherly feelings towards you younger girls and how hard you work and how smart you are. I just forgot what I was doing when I was checking at Wal-Mart when a young girl would come in with a couple of kids, coupons, and all their ads in a row, I would just stand back and admire.

    I was sort of like that, only not so good.

    Still, Bill will have me open the door and hold it for him when he carries in a box. And open the car door. I tell him a woman would be able to carry a box, a purse, a baby, it's bottle, and open the door with her big toe.I find that tremendously annoying about him.
    posted by Blogger annegb at 2/24/2006 07:53:00 PM  

  • Those are serious talents, I agree. I still can't use the bathroom while holding a baby, though. Maybe some of you have light babies? Or I'm a weakling.
    posted by Blogger Squiddy at 2/25/2006 07:13:00 AM  

  • Yup, I'm Elastigirl...can't do the ones WAY up high above the oven hood, but above the sink and all that jazz...sho can. And yes my DH is lucky...I got all kinds of good tips from the FMH post last week too.... ; )
    posted by Blogger Kage at 2/25/2006 02:43:00 PM  

  • Oh, yes, I can do that. I know because of my grandson. It's not pretty, but, still...
    posted by Blogger annegb at 2/25/2006 11:19:00 PM  

  • Today at church one of the clerks was holding his sleeping son. He stapled a paper, then refilled it and used it again. Without so much as jostling the napping nugget.
    *whistles* I'm in awe!
    posted by Blogger Mo Mommy at 2/26/2006 06:29:00 PM  

  • Wow, Kage, I'm amazing ith my toes/feet too, but I don't think I can open the high cupboards above the sink. That is something to shoot for.
    posted by Blogger mindy at 2/27/2006 11:25:00 AM  

  • Mindy, I have been on your blog a few times and notice there is no way to post comments...so I will post here that I want to be able to post. I want to comment on your chop chop and tell you about zinone's (poster on this site)rat...and about my mouse experience...but there is no place to post, so I guess you will just have to be in suspense while you practice your toe moves. marian, oh webmaster you...I apologize for not staying on topic here, I understand if you delete me.
    posted by Blogger Kage at 2/27/2006 05:20:00 PM  

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